Monday, May 24, 2010

He Called Me Out

"Dating someone who is divorced requires patience," he stated. Barely above a whisper.

I looked at him side-eyed but did not respond. Wanted to see where he was going with it. Because I KNOW he was not calling me high maintenance.

"You require patience. I understand, it's cool," he said as he looked back at me side-eyed with a wicked grin on his face. "I can be patient."

"You calling me high maintenance on the sly?" I could not resist the question.

He laughed at me.

"Long way from it, Luv. You're extremely cautious. You hide behind a brick wall. Think you can put in a door or at least a window?"

His words stung.

After several moments I replied, "Guess I've made progress. The wall was covered in ice with a moat around it. I'll see what the contractor quotes me and get back to you. The window probably...but the door," I shook my head. "You may be pushing it."

He called me out.

I say I am open to love, want it and need it. Have my arms open to allow it to walk right in but when it comes down to it...I hide behind a brick wall. Since my re-entry into this dating world I have not been treated poorly but have not been treated well either. It is my fault. I have allowed men to give me bits and pieces, snacking on crumbs while nursing a huge hunger that requires a full meal.

I have allowed men to give tidbits of time as they deem fit while they carved out pieces of themselves for me and her and her. Settled for just OK when I desired more, gave more and thought having a starting lineup would help fulfill the emptiness left by the franchise player. I was approaching this all wrong...waiting on men to realize I was worthy of their time and commitment when the truth is they knew I would never be their 'one' but it did not stop me from patiently pursuing the few I chose.

But now...I am being pursued. Courted.

The very thing I write about here at The Storm and comment on various posts of fellow bloggers is happening to me.

Invites to events, having dinner cooked for me, being introduced to friends and associates. Yes, even passing the friendship test way before being more than a friend was a consideration (on my part at least).

And I am running away...

We met by chance at an event I attended with my Salsa group. It was a Christian singles event and we were invited to spark interest in Salsa before classes began at the next event. He was the DJ (another creative mind, can't seem to get away from them) and I asked for a card (always the event planner) because he was literally rocking the place. Only to find out we already knew each other in passing.

That Blue & White world is too damn small.

The conversation lured me in. He is an orator and has an amazing way with words. There is nothing like a man who can express himself. Who can give you a compliment in one breath and tell you you're trying his patience with the next and it comes across as nothing short of communication. It is not mean or angry and it leads to conversation instead of arguments.

What's the problem? I knew you would ask.

I am an old soul and he is young. Sometimes it shows. Younger than anyone I have ever dated or considered dating. Not KayC you are being a Cougar young but a good 4 years younger. And being in the Blue & White network means there is someone he has a history with that I know...pretty well.

He makes a living in the entertainment industry which I vowed to step away from. Especially after my Addiction. Women flock to Men Behind the Mike (Thanks to Mrs. Mary Mack for that term) and that lifestyle is not easy on relationships even when you do trust your partner.

He is not physically what I would go for. I am shallow...and I can call myself out on it. Actually, I am not shallow I just want the total package. Whatever that is for me. I have settled before with someone because he had a great personality and when that personality began to fade and the 'real him' came out I no longer liked him and there was nothing else to him. Nothing to spark my interest and that is not a good place to reside.

I am treading dangerous waters and I have no clue what I am going to do. But I can tell you that being pursued by someone who makes the time to do so is a wonderful feeling. Being around someone who gives you space at events but can turn around and tell you, "I know what I want and I want you. I am going to pursue you."

Great feeling indeed.

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...

Monday, May 17, 2010

How I'm Feeling...This Type of Love

I am a hopeless romantic. Have been a member of the hopeless romantic club since I can remember. It has nothing with fairy tale books or Disney movies. My house had no real signs of healthy relationship-type love growing up, so I have no clue where this devout hopeless romantic trait has its roots. Maybe it was my desire to be the opposite, to break the cycle, to have the unattainable? My fantasies have nothing to do with a man on a white horse who whisks me away to live happily ever after.

I simply believe in love.

I believe in deep-my heart skips a beat when I see you-get butterflies when I'm walking to you-can feel the sparks when I touch you- type of love. Enduring love that makes deep kisses not deep enough and the morning rays of sunshine come way too fast-type of love. The type of love where people look at you looking at him/her and smile an all-knowing smile because you can't hide it type of love.

I want that type of love.

I need that type of love.

One day it will find me...this type of love:

Take me back in the day when loving was pure
Love ain't going away, love is always secure
Life's not always perfect but love's always forever
Lets let true love connect lets try lasting together

I'm so ready to love, I'm so ready to promise my all
I'm so ready to give til' the day that my life is no more
I'll be everything that this woman could possibly be
Cause I'm ready to be like the olden days when commitment was golden

Be the man of my dreams and get down on one knee, love
Say you'll be all I need and then ask me to marry you, my love
Lets take two golden bands and lets walk down the isle, love
I'll say I do and you'll say I do, make a golden commitment, oh

I'm so ready to love, I'm so ready to promise my whole all
and I'm so ready to give til' the day that my life is no more
I'll be everything that this woman could possibly be, yes I will
Cause I'm ready to be like the olden days when commitment was golden

Let's last forever (let's last forever)
No typical american shady love
Let's stay together (let's stay together)
Pray God smile upon ours

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...

Monday, May 10, 2010

Let's Hear It For the Boys

I have few friends in life. Do not get me wrong, my life is rich with great relationships but the word friend carries a strong meaning for me. My friends are my chosen family. They are with me through thick and thin and allow me to be me...whoever that is at the moment. Because of this it is very difficult to make it to friendship status with me but once you are there, you are always there.

My oldest and dearest friend came to visit for the first time in 3 years. We have been friends since my very first day of ninth grade. When I walked into a new school and sat down in home room. He was sitting next to me and introduced himself. He immediately gave me a was KayC. Guess it stuck :)

This was us almost 20 years ago:

We've been friends through marriages, births, deaths and divorces. He has been there with me since before I had real curves and was comfortable in my skin. We have seen each other at our worst and confessed things to each other most people would rather take to their grave. He is my brother from another mother, my twin from another womb. Over the years we can still smile together like this:

When meeting MoA (which was totally coincidental) he explained that he was one part of Martin and Will in Bad Boys. The gun toting big brothers at the front door. MoA, being the man he is, seemed to take it all in stride. Guess it helped that it was the end of his night and he had finished performing and packing up instruments and equipment. Even exhausted he looked great and I'm keeping that photo to myself :)

Over the weekend we hung out (hard) with the third member of the crew, drank way too much, laughed way too loud and shut down more than one spot. They gave me insight on this new dating game (my Addiction included) and sized up everyone who wanted to approach me. (Of course no one did hanging with those two)

It was just what the doctor ordered after nursing an injury that is keeping me off the Salsa dance floor and dealing with this thing called Life. They gave me insight and I provided insight on women (as much as I could). Sometimes it is just the pick me up you need when you are with people who know you, get you and still love you without any of the intimate relationship gunk getting in the way.

Cheering on my men...let's hear it for the boys!

Love you guys.

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...

Monday, May 3, 2010

Storm Breaker...How the Fight Started

I needed to lighten the mood here at The Storm and once again my silly friends have provided a good laugh delivered via my inbox. Love my girls! Enjoy...

If you ever wonder how 'the fight' started in your relationship...

One year, a husband decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift...

The next year, he didn't buy her a gift.

When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"

And that's how the fight started...


My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'

'No,' she answered.

I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'

She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.'

So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.'

And that's how the fight started...


I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

'Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's how the fight started...


My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels. She asked,'What's on TV?'

I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...


My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary..

She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.'

I bought her a scale.

And then the fight started...


My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, 'Do you know him?'

'Yes,' she sighed, 'He's my old boyfriend... I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' I said, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started...


I rear-ended a car this morning... So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny?

Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!! He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

And then the fight started....


When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the truck, the car, playing golf. Always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.

I said, 'When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.'

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

And THAT is how the fight started, LOL! Have a wonderful week blog fam.

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...