Thursday, November 20, 2014

Addictions Always Return, Don't They?

It has been years since I have battled my Addiction. You remember that, don't you?

I walked away.

I RAN away and never looked back.

Except to stare at my phone that year he called me on my birthday. It took everything I had to let my Addiction go to voicemail. But I did not answer...I was strong...and extremely proud of myself.

Earlier this fall I heard my addiction was getting married. He was marrying the "girlfriend." You remember her, the "girlfriend" he swore was not the girlfriend. They had smiling photos on a wedding site proclaiming their undying love and how they met.

Good for them. Everyone deserves to be happy, right? No sarcasm, just genuine "if you are happy, then I am happy for you." Did it sting a little? Of course but such is life. Build a bridge and get over it.  *But you know KayC did keep her eyes open for wedding photos. Ha! Come on, you were curious and so was I*

So why the post? Because going through my email today I saw this on my Linkedin feed:

"Your Addiction's" invitation is waiting for your response...

*KayC eyes the screen and wipes eyes to clear them*

Surely, my Addiction did not think enough time has passed to keep in touch? Seriously, he does not think that I would accept such an invite? And why on Linkedin and not any other social media? Is that because the former "girlfriend" now wife would see it?

Surely, he does not think that KayC gets down like that?

Now...where is the delete button....because Addictions always return. Right?

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Adventures in Online Dating - Why Lie?

Installment #3 in this series. You can check out installment one and installment two if you wish to do so.

I have dance listed on my profile as something I enjoy doing in my spare time. I thought it was interesting when an older man contacted me and said he also loved to dance. He mentioned that he danced ballroom competitively and he was looking forward to learning Argentine Tango. Right up my alley, right? I replied to his email and it went something like this:

Me: I see you like to dance Salsa and listen to it often. What artists are on your playlist?

Him: ...I don't really have a "list." I like all kinds...a lot of what is played at the clubs though...I do enjoy Gypsy Kings, Santana, Marc Anthony, etc.

I know my way around the Salsa/Bachata/Cha Cha/Etc. scene…..Learning Argentine Tango is on my wish list….ideally I'd learn it with my life partner and love. What kind of dancing do you perform?

Me: O_O *crickets* 

Okay, let me break this down. As someone who "dances salsa on a regular basis" he would have a list of artists that he likes. Especially if he dances Salsa competitively. How do you dance as serious as he proclaims and not know who you are dancing to?

Strike One....

The next thing is the artists he listed. Even in the mainstream clubs they would NEVER play Santana nor Gypsy Kings risk having the dance floor clear out. You might get one or two Marc Anthony songs but those are rare. Clearly this was either someone pretending with a fake account or someone lying about what they like to do. Why lie? Did he really think I would fall for that? Hell, I even listed an artist that I like in my profile. Why not google them and see what pops up? Geesh....

Strike Two....

And for lying about it...Strike Three....

Moving on....

There are good exchanges but the bad ones make for good reading :-) Stay tuned, I am sure there is still more to come

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...

Monday, October 13, 2014

Adventures in Online Dating - Did He Really Say that?

It took some convincing for a few friends to talk me into this online dating thing. There are a few people in my social circles that have met using an online forum and it has worked for them. One of the couples married this past weekend. Congrats!

I tried the free trial first and it was...okay. It was really interesting that most men were only interested in women under the age of 35 and listed every ethnic group instead of African-American/Black. Man, there is very little love for black women in online dating. I can not even say women of color because they all seem to favor Latina/Hispanic and even Asian or Pacific Islander. They really listed EVERYONE except black women.

I mean.....WOW.... O_O

Well, I had about 30 emails before I decided that I would actually go on and check this thing out. Most of them were from the typical black men, hat over his eyes, chest out in photos, using emails that were obviously copied and pasted to every girl he saw. One even asked me to lunch in the first very email. Try at least asking my name first, okay? What was really interesting was that most of the men who seemed to take the time to read my profile and try to make an interesting conversation were white men. And they were not playing with their approach, which made the other men pale in comparison.

But there was one IM message that took place that was worth sharing. It went something like this:

Him: I can help you with your career
Me: My career?
Him: Yes, I can help you. I can show you some moves
Me: *crickets*
Him: Do you make money dancing?
Me: How can you help me with my career?
Him: I can show you some moves
Me: You don't know what type of dance I do
Him: I can help
Me: Are you a strip club owner? Manager?
Him: No, I can just help
Me: I'm ending this conversation now. Good Bye

and then I hit the block button. Laughed at him and signed off. That was my first and last instant message conversation on that site. I never said dancing was my profession. My profession is listed and it is NOT dance. Anyone else thinks he was a pimp? Yeah, I do as well.

Did he really say that?!?

Stay tuned, I am sure there is more to come

Until Next Time,
Peace & Blessings...