I posted a few years ago about my cousin and I making a pact to see the world together. We took a cruise and then things went south (the best laid plans of mice and men). She took on a part-time job and I had a few unexpected car repairs come up that took the "extra" I had planned on using for travel (outside of my scheduled performances).
Well, fast forward a few years and my cousin is now a new mommy! This is something she has wanted for some time but had experienced a great deal of complications in doing so. What makes me so proud of her? Other than the obvious thing of opening your heart and life to a precious life that requires molding and guidance? I am proud of her because she adopted a very lucky baby girl.
African-Americans tend to frown upon adoption but we have adopted for generations. We just called it "so-and-so will come stay with us for a while." Then they never left. What is adoption other than that? Kids living with relatives or friends of the family while their parents "got themselves together." Sound familiar? You had cousins growing up like siblings and friends children being treated like one of their own for many years. Adoption (to me) is just like that but with legal paperwork.
My cousin is single, never been married but knew she wanted to be a mother. She is extremely stable, has two sisters and a brother in immediate proximity who help with the baby along five nieces and nephews who are old enough to baby sit when needed (whom she helped raise and was there for daily). Like I said, this baby will never know what it is like to NOT be loved.
|Photo courtesy of her Auntie|
Seeing her with her new daughter warms my heart. It is strange to see her with her own child and her sisters fuss over her daughter like she is their own (I often tease her that she adopted a baby for her sisters, she is not the mom :-) Referring to her as "mommy" will take some getting used to but I am so proud of her for going after the life she wants. She knew what wanted, knew what path she wanted her life to go and made it happen. In doing so, she is making life wonderful for a little girl who might not have had the same opportunities she will have now.
One thing I do talk to lucky baby about is our little joke. Her mother and I were the last two women in the family to not have children. Lucky baby and I were lounging on the sofa and I was failing miserably at keeping her awake in an effort for her to sleep at night. Lucky baby -1, KayC - 0.
I told her, "Your mommy and I had a pact to see the world. We were the last two who did not have babies and then she was blessed with you. Now why did she go and do that to me?"
While sleeping peacefully in my arms she stretched, smiled a little, yawned and continued to sleep.
Lucky baby indeed :-)