I recently found out my chances for having children are very slim. There is no wild sexual history (quite the opposite) and I have never had an STD. I did everything "right" so to speak. I was one of those mythical creatures that earned her white dress when she walked down the aisle.
Now I find myself mad, angry, frustrated that my body may have portrayed me. That my insides are growing things they should not be growing. Mutating in ways that may be unsafe. I just want a clean bill of health...all of a sudden having children is not important. My mother's desire of having her only child give her a pass into grandmother hood is a mute point.
I just want to forget the world. I retreat when I need time to think, to deal with the things being thrown my way. This is one of my favorite shows and right now one of my favorite songs.
Just for a short time, I want to forget the world...
If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me
And just forget the world?
Peace & Blessings...