Books, Heat and Drums

I decided to lighten the mood of this blog and post something upbeat and happy. It was bright and hot outside this weekend and I decided to venture out before dance practice to give one of my line sisters some support.

The book signing was held downtown and I forgot how much it costs to park, but it was good to get out and walk around. I had not been a pedestrian in the downtown area since college some 10+ years ago and the landscape has changed drastically. I loved seeing the families and couples of all colors walking around to various locals enjoying the hot summer weather.

And to top it off, I got a chance to support my line sister and buy a copy of her book (which was edited by another LS of ours, gotta love networking :). So, if you get a chance to stop by your nearest bookstore or library make sure to pick up a copy. She’s a good writer.

After dance practice I attended a West African Drum Show. One of the drummers is a part of my performance group so a few dancers went to the show. They had a guest master drummer that gave me a few Azucar Negra moments. It was a fun outing for Saturday night, nothing like seeing people get up and move to live drum beats.

Hmmm…we should go to another performance when we are not tired from dance practice. I bet we could wear that dance floor out! (Not that we didn’t give it a good shot this time :-)

Peace and Blessings,

Foreign Concept of Father's Day

I realized how few people I have to call on Father's Day. On Mother's Day I had an entire list that would have taken me all day if it had not been for text messages and email. I had exactly three people to call and none of them was my biological father.

My father was anticipating his 20th birthday when I was born. He had no idea of what being a father was because he was barely a man himself. He did not have the opportunity to find comfort in his own skin before he was tasked to help me find comfort in mine.

I appreciate the posts about fathers who told their daughters they were beautiful and helped them feel loved. Fathers that showed up on time and have great memories with their daughters.

Not my father.

He never told me I was beautiful or even pretty. My father was absent from my high school graduation and absent from my college graduation. He was nowhere to be found when my heart was broken for the first time or when I was picked on by my classmates when my mother and I moved to a new state. He was absent when I found my first love, absent from the track meets, basketball games and when I crossed the burning sands of time.

He has no clue of the woman I have become.

But as much anger as I had for him, I do not have it anymore. I feel sorry for him. He is now trying to regain the time he lost with me by giving it to his wife, son and daughter. I listen to him on our rare phone conversations talk about my youngest sister refusing to be a daddy's girl anymore and how he coaches little league football with my younger brother.

I listen to him talk about his house and the things I never had growing up because he "never had to worry about me" as I was always an "old soul".

I feel bad that nothing in me wants to celebrate father's day with him. I have only four pictures of the two of us growing up and I remember not wanting to take two of them. As time goes on I pray that I learn more about forgiveness. I pray that I learn how to tell when people are simply incapable of showing love.

I have forgiven my father...maybe one day he can forgive himself.

Fifty and Fantabulous

I have one extremely bad and long running celebrity crush. It is the purple one himself in all of his sexually ambiguous glory. This man must have one great skin care and hair regime. He is one of the few people who look better as the years go by.

Anyway, he is 50 today. Yep, I said the big 5-0. I can only hope to look this good at fifty...Happy Birthday to the royal one. (Shaking my head in admiration...with a smile on my face)

Sadly, I have not seen him in concert. That is definitely on my things-to-do list. He recently played an outdoor festival that included surprise jam sessions with Wendy and Lisa, Sheila E, and Morris Day.

That is a concert I would have promised my first-born to see! :)

My list of favorite Prince music is long. As I enjoy the weekend celebration of Prince and Prince Protégé videos playing on VH1 Soul, I ask you...what is your favorite Prince song?